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We were too buzzed to murmur anything besides how badly we yearned for a warm bed. When he left, closing the door behind him, I regretted all the times I let him eat me out and especially the times I reciprocated. Caribbean mothers want to eat their daughters. When I exited the store, I saw that amongst the small crowd of people leaving the train station was Cecilia. Tonight I asked him if he was fucking Lindsey when we were together. I teased her about it — that incessant need to moisturize throughout the day — but I wondered if growing up dark-skinned in a place like the Bay Area had done a number on her. One time we got into a mini-argument because Cecilia thought it was hypocritical for black women like me to say that we prefer black men but then judge black women who prefer white men.

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She was smiling as though she was glad to see me.

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At the very least, I could have imagined her with the type of black guy who went to Yale — certainly not a wannabe rapper from Brooklyn. Later I would learn that they were brothers who lived in the Bronx. Tonight mi a get down pon mi knees fi dat woman. One of the girls, a redhead named Kath, started talking about the latest episode of "Girls. Or I might major in fine arts. White people oppress us without even trying.

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